SomtoIheme blog

Akpos Joke: Mathematical Problem  | By Beneddy | Add a Comment Akpos was preparing for his A Levels Mathematics Examination. The more he studied, the more he semed not to understanding a thing. he consulted Angelina for help. AKPOS: Baby, I’ve been trying to solve this question since morning but I’m not getting anywhere with it. ( 60-53+10=what will you have?) Angelina: Ok, lets reason it this way, if you have 60 (sixty) wraps of Indian Hemp and you smoke 53 (fifty three), after consuming 1(one) big bottle of whisky you then smoke another 10 (ten) wraps, what will you have? Akpos: Ah! I will have a brain damage, high blood pressure stroke, first grade madness, paralysis and comatose. Angelina: That’s exactly what this Maths question will give you when you solve it.

Akpos Joke: Bring My Gun  | By Beneddy | Add a Comment  One day, thieves came to Akpos’ house. His father quickly noticed them and asked Akpos to bring his gun. After Akpos brought him his gun, he told him to hide in the room. As the thieves entered, his father brandished his gun at them and they began to tremble. Suddenly, Akpos came out of the room. His father, surprised, commanded, “Go inside!” Akpos shouted back, “Dad, you forgot to put water into the gun.” Akpos’ father is currently in the hospital receiving treatment

Nigeria Joke: Argument  | Bye Beneddy | Add a Comment Wikipedia : I know everything. Google : I have everything. Facebook : I know everybody. Internet : Without me, you are all nothing. NEPA: Keep talking …we shall see

Nigerian Joke: I love you, sweetheart | By Beneddy | Add Comment A group of men gathered at a church conference on how to live in a loving relationship with their wives. The men were asked, “How many of you love your wife ?” All the men raised their hands. Then they were asked, “When was the last time you told your wife you love her ?” Some men answered today, some yesterday, majority didn’t remember. The men were then told to take their cell phones and send the following text to their respective wives: I love you, sweetheart… Then the men were told to exchange their phones so one can read the other wife’s reply to the love message. Here are some of the replies: 1. Have you impregnated someone again 2. That was then, not now 3. You wan borrow money abi? 4. What did you do again? I won’t forgive you this time. 5. Meaning? 6. Is that a new song? 7. Am I dreaming? 8. If you don’t tell me who this message is actually for, you will die...

‘Wise’ sayings from Akpos  | By Beneddy | Add a Comment Only a courageous woman can fry a bunch of plantain without tasting any Albert Macauley (1872) He who says nothing lasts forever has never tried Hausa perfume Nelson Mandela (1973) He who completely unwraps banana and Ga kenkey before eating cannot keep a secret Abraham Lincoln (1864) Any man that uses his teeth to cut meat from pepper soup, with his eyes wide open, is not afraid of anything Williams Shakespeare (1900) Anyone who graduates without experiencing a strike, has never been to Nigeria Lord Lugard (1904) He who refuses to regard bread and akara as a type of sandwich is a racist Martin Luther King Jnr (1788) Any man who drinks Alomo bitters without squeezing his face, is capable of murder Michael Faraday (1899)

FUO Student Bags Nigerian Writers Series Awards Home >> News >> 2015 03 >> FUO Student Bags Nigerian Writers Series Awards .. on Mon, 03/02/2015 - 16:12 A 300 level student of English and Communications Studies Department, Federal University Otuoke – Julius Bokoru has made the University proud by winning the Nigerian Writers Series Awards through his book – “The Angel that was Always There”. The 141 paged Memoir written in 17 Chapters portrayed the plight of single motherhood with its setting in Ijaw land. The Memoir excludes picturesque and poignant tales that give account of Julius Bokoru’s childhood experiences while skillfully weaving a gripping tale portraying single parenthood, its pain and struggles. Julius Bokoru’s book while being a debut Memoir is a creative non-fiction that seeks to answer some of the most disturbing question: “Where is my father?” “Why don’t I know him?” “Why is society disrespecting my mother because she is a singl...

2015 Forbes Billionaires List Out - 5 Nigerians Make The Cut The 2015 Forbes list of billionaires is now out. Five Nigerian made the cut - Aliko Dangote, Mike Adenuga, Folorunsho Alakija, Femi Otedola and Abdulsamad Rabiu. Orji Uzor Kalu and Tony Elumelu who made the list last year were dropped off the list this year.  Bill Gates is still the richest man in the world. Facebook's Mark Zuckerberg is now the 16th richest man in the world. The youngest billionaire in the world is 24 year old Evan Spiegel, the co-founder of photo- messaging app, Snapchat. Aliko Dangote is the year's biggest loser, hi fortune dropped to $14.7 billion from $25 billion last year.  From Forbes For our 29th annual guide to the globe’s richest, we found a record 1,826 billionaires with an aggregate net worth of $7.05 trillion, up from $6.4 trillion a year ago. The total includes 290 newcomers, 71 of whom hail from China. Youth are on the rise: A record 46 among the ranks are under ...